An entirely pointless tale of woe

Well, the husband is out on tour ,for  this  (among other things ) for a few days and this time the grandson magnet hasn't been switched on  has met it's match in the grandparents own commitments. WHY do grandparents have to have a life of their own!!

Anyway, so here I am , looking after baby all by myself for the last few days . Going to bed at night has become an exercise in obsessive door locking,barricading with chair,hiding something sharp in the bedroom  ,struggling with a tired but reluctant to sleep baby and self. Sure enough, things began unravelling the day after the husband left. The land line (and internet) went on a break(repaired after 48 hours and long distance telephonic intervention from the spouse, the baby had his first fall from the pram( and thankfully had nothing broken ), then the only tubelight in the computer room literally went on the blink!The icing on the cake was of course one night or rather at 4 am that morning, when I was lying in bed petrified because there was


....A DOOR BANGING intermittently when it had no business to be banging or creaking or making it's presence felt in any way whatsoever. After half an hour of peeking through the curtains of the bedroom window to check for wind blown trees (and finding none),and lying in bed trying to work out ways to inflict maximum damage on the cause of the banging door, I finally decided to swallow my pride, and called the neighbours.Sigh...after the cause of my downfall was identified as the unlatched outside door of a house in the next block, being banged by the breeze and offers to "come and sleep in our spare bedroom" were declined, I managed to get some shuteye. "Refreshed" by the four precious hours of rest and the lack of a wide awake baby, I had only one question endlessly chasing it's tail on my mind, namely

 WHY do husbands have to go out on TD (that's temporary duty for the un-fauji-initiated crowd)? Do they not realise the horrors they inflict on their wives by  doing so?That they leave us alone in these groundfloor houses, with umpteem , creaky  doors opening to the surrounding grounds. Don't they realise that we can only enjoy the bright sunny lawn in the daytime?That we may not always prefer brushing our teeth/taking care of stuff while keeping an eagle eye and an iron grip on a wriggling baby who has to inspect objects on the floor while seated in an object raised a few feet above the floor with utter disregard for the gravity of the situation!

On top of all this, the poor suffering wife can't even sing her tale of woe gently remonstrate the husband with words like "I can't even leave your son alone for a second without  finding him almost hanging upside down from the bed/pram and/or chewing the switchboard wire/remote/phone/MY BOOK" , without being subjected to totally beside the point rejoinders like   "you're enjoying his smiles and all the new things he's learning  while I'm out on work doing what I really love and spending my spare time by the pool ,  missing him like anything", or text messages  like this in the middle of the day/night

"Aaayyyyyy voooeeessss meeeeee!!!"

hmpff! Artimonkitrix and I  think this bong is crazy!